"...and still we rise"

The title for the conference that I attended last week in Toronto came from the title of the poem "Still I Rise" by Maya Angelou. Originally written to portray the message of perseverance shown by African Americans in facing racism, the poem speaks to any person who can dig into their own being to find strength in fighting their own demons.

Still I Rise
by Maya Angelou

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.


I found the entire poem so powerful that I wanted to share it, and maybe provide some subtle inspiration as it did for me.
Although the theme of the conference (sponsored by the Elementary Teacher's Federation of Ontario) was "Working Together to Create Healthy Schools and Communities", I'm sure each of the over 400 women who attended would tell you that we came away with so much more than that. Through humour, inspirational and motivational speakers, and elective workshops we learned more than new teaching strategies; we also learned to take a long, hard look at ourselves. Could we laugh at ourselves? Could we look around and not judge the person next to us for not finding the humour in the same jokes that I might? Could we make the necessary shifts in our lives to achieve what we are capable of, and what will make us happy? Could we learn to look after ourselves so that we aren't always at the bottom of our priority list? Could we learn to come together to face the burdens of our profession, but also to unload the weight of our own minds?

There were moments during those two days that I was laughing til my sides hurt...when our first motivational speaker "Linda Edgecombe" shared her story about her lack of knowledge of what "going commando" meant. Apparently she thought that it was the name of the cologne worn by the very attractive man sitting next to her on a four hour flight. He told her he was going commando when she asked him what he had on. Thinking that she might like to buy some of this unheard of cologne for her husband, she leaned over and told him that she just had to get her some of that! Her point...we all have stories that are too real to be made up. To be out their living life means we have new stories to tell. So get out there and start creating new stories.

There were also moments that the tissues were being pulled out of handbags, and tears filled almost every eye...when Sally Armstrong shared her horrific stories about the women of the Congo who had been severely sexually assaulted but still had the courage to band together to create change in their world. Or when the documentary film "The Red Jacket" was shown telling the story of the young man in British Columbia who had been so badly beaten that he was left permanently brain damaged, unable to care for himself and needing 24 hour care, all because he was wearing the colour red in a neighbourhood whose gang colours were blue.

Even more than the camraderie, the sharing of stories and emotions, the luxury of being pampered at The Royal York, and the full schedule of events, this conference once again provided me with another moment in my life to allow my own shift. We all have situations in our lives that seem beyond our control, allowing that feeling of hopelessness to seep back in. But, we also have it in ourselves to create the change, to continue to rise, to live a fulfilled life. If I'm not happy, then it's up to me to start making the changes to be happy. As the title of Linda Edgecombe's book so perfectly stated Shift...or Get Off the Pot.

Something to Think About

"First, you must find me.
Then, you must follow me.
Choosing, you will test me.
Knowing, you will challenge me.
At last, you must deserve me."

I came across this passage while randomly searching through blogs this morning. It is a quote taken from Charlotte Kandel's book The Scarlett Stockings. In the book, the riddle refers to the stockings. When I first read it, however, I thought of how many of our life experiences could reflect this quote. The choices of our lives mingled with the paths of our destiny.

I Know I'm Whining

Dr. Oz recommends placing a clove of garlic in the ear, and holding it in place with a bandaid (as I am writing this post, both garlic and bandaid are pressed firmly against my left ear). A colleague suggested cold compresses, another hot, yet another said to alternate between the two. One helpful friend proposed a mixture of peroxide and warm water. After prescribing my second round of a more potent antibiotic, my doctor mentionned drops of mineral oil for my ear, and a Neti Pot for my nose. I blindly (or deafly) put my trust in these two suggestions despite the fact that the mineral oil that I purchased at the pharmacy made no reference to ears for recommended usage, but insisted that it was beneficial as a laxative. As for the Neti Pot, anything that looks like a teapot and pours like a teapot, should not be inserted into any body parts. What goes in must come out as I tipped my head, poured the warm salt water solution in one nostril, felt the uncomfortable path that the solution was making through my nasal passages, watched it drip with indignity out the other nostril, while at the same time listening to the demanding instructions of my oldest daughter "Do it again, mom, you have to do it twice in each nostril for it to work...and keep your mouth closed!" She was right about the mouth; funny how all those cavities are connected.

After two weeks, a diagnosis of both an ear infection and sinus infection, time off work, and thousands of "pardon me", "what did you say", "could you repeat that", I am open to all suggestions...within reason, cost, and dignity. Truthfully, the dignity probably isn't a factor at this point as I sit here with a garlic clove sticking out of my ear; or as I remember walking around Home Depot last weekend with some form of mucus draining out my ear and a kleenex stuffed as indiscreetly as possible inside, all while trying to listen intently to the helpful salesman explain how effectively this model of toilet flushes everything away! Honestly, where else could it possibly go?

As with each sickness or injury that I find myself inflicted with, when I start to whine or get frustrated, I once again remind myself of the appreciation of being healthy, and how fortunate I am to be able to drive myself to my doctor, get a prescription, and expect to get better. Although I'm thinking that maybe all I had to do was drive to the grocery story and buy some garlic!

I Thought Tweetie was a Bird that Sylvester Ate

Feeling too comfortable usually indicates that change is on the horizon. It wasn't that I was feeling too comfortable with my Chocolate of Women blog, but rather, I thought that I should make an attempt to stay as technologically current as my "untechnological" mind would allow. Thus, the addition of two new gadgets (as they are called in blog land) to my website. Reading this right now, you will have already seen that the first addition is Twitter. I guess my iphone, msn, skype, Facebook, my dinosaur phone land line, my blog, and various email accounts didn't make me quite as accessible to the people in my life as I thought. I felt the computer age peer pressure of needing the next best thing (although true computer geeks would say that Twitter is not only NOT the next best thing, but is already sliding quickly down the slope of antiquity...ahhh, to actually be talking big word computer language and really know what I'm saying). After scanning through various blogs, I caved, and added "Follow me on Twitter". Now I get to twitter, tweet, retweet, blog, IM, text, and talk, all while lmao.

The next new gadget is a little less conspicuous, requires very little compgeek (my own word) training, and is much more enjoyable. "My Blog List" has been added to the sidebar with a link to blogs that I am following. Plural "blogs" is as yet just a singular "blog", but, this list will continue to grow. "Musings from afar" is about a high school teacher in rural Alaska...enjoy, and appreciate!